Workplace Transcripts I June 15, 2006
Posted by thomas in : xanga , add a comment A transcription of a conversation between two of my fellow landscapers upon the purchase of a grande mocha frappuccino from Starbucks during our lunch break, edited for language (and some) content.“Ah, this mocha frappuccino is delicious. I find it quite refreshing on a warm day like today, however, I find the price of five dollars most unjust.”
“Yes, I quite agree, I myself am unwilling to pay such exorbitant prices.”
“I also quite dislike the usual Starbucks clientele.”
”Do explain.”
“I suspect that a number of males who both work and purchase coffee drinks from Starbucks are homosexuals. I feel uncomfortable with their effeminate speech and tight pants.”
“Yes, I often have had the same suspicion upon entering Starbucks. I have also been peeved in particular by the eyeglasses of both the males and females who work and purchase coffee at Starbucks. It makes me feel angry: like I want to strike something.”
“Yes, the eyewear of Starbucks clientele tends to be carefully chosen according to the current trend. I find that the women are always wearing large oversized sunglasses and the men wear glasses that are particularly stylish. You know the sort I’m talking about. Stylish glasses. I know that some of them even wear glasses without a prescription because they enjoy the look of them.”
“You don’t say!”
“Indeed, I do not deceive you.”
“They all drive Volkswagens as well.”
“Volkswagen drivers. They have such ridiculous haircuts.”
Life, as wine June 4, 2006
Posted by thomas in : xanga , add a comment|
Sometimes I wish days were like wine and I had a huge wine cellar with bottles of red and purple tucked in every earthy nook and cranny. On dark and overcast days when I was lonely and tired I could go down the creaking wooden stairs and run my fingers over the smooth glass surfaces. I would pull out a bottle and examine the date and measure the weight of it in my hands, and then move on, searching for the right one. I would come across a bottle marked “June 2nd through 4th, 2006″, a deliciously smooth blend with a sweet and haunting aftertaste. ”Three days in one bottle”, I would say to myself, “must have been a great weekend”. And yes, yes it was, but for now I will have to trust the days to the memories which tend to run like children in the grassy playgrounds of my mind, laughing and short of breath, much harder to catch and to hold then a bottle of wine. But much warmer too. |
